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User blog:Awesomesix/Awesome Rap Battles Season Four: Adolf Hitler vs Joseph Stalin
Okay, fuck Hendrix vs Cobain, it's getting annoying to try to fix. So instead, I decided to publish this one. Cunning leader of Russia during World War II, Joseph Stalin, faces off against the infamous dictator perhaps known as the cruelest person in history, Adolf Hitler, leader of Germany during said war, to see who really won. Credit to Tigger and Flats for title cards, and ERB as well obviously. Beat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZsYgIz_xuk RAP MEANINGS COMING SOON NOTE: Title Cards do not work with lyrics, ok Battle AWESOME RAP BAATTLESS! VS! BEGIN! Adolf Hitler: Gutentag to the Gulag, Holocaust at your boys, Jose! Hitler’s gonna deliver shivers to the Winter Soldier today! The most diabolical artist, Auschwitz the smartest, Fuck over Mother Russia like a Communist heart, bitch! You’ve got a bush under your nose, and babushka flow, For the leader of the Russians, Stalin’s pretty damn slow! I’ll take your Jewish schnoz on a little trip to Mein Kampf, And invade your motherland while you take a nice steam bath! Hitler spits it dark, tones even the Apartheid can’t split apart! And when Adolf aims to chancel out Stalin, he hits the Bismarck! When flu season gets ahold, I spit a cold at a northern neighbor! You’re Hairy Potter’s successor, so enter my Secret Chambers! Joseph Stalin: I’ve had it up to here with you, dog,and your master race blue/blonde, I’ll shoot you and your boo, Braun, and send you to the Gulag! Stalin’s the man of steel, with the iron fist to squash any Dictator! So I’ll scalp a scrawny scallop, and make some sweet Kissel for later! Tell me; how’d you gain a whole army if you couldn’t draw a person? I mean, your art career sunk lower than Germany’s debts you worsened! Invade my land? Are you kidding me? You don’t remember our last fight? Shoot you down screaming “May day!”; it's your second successful suicide! Make Hirohito Kamikaze; bust Mussolini in a Full Nelson like Fred Durst! This Georgian’s got top dog rhymes, while it seems Germany brat wurst! Bring the cuisine to fight the meanest, get eaten like a picnic in Dacha; Stir up drama, and your pasta, sushi, and sausage are all goners! Take that back, you weenie! Don’t be a meanie to Mussolini! You best get retreating, my rhymes will twist you up like linguine! You soiled your Lenin party, so piss off! Or Saluto al Duce! I'll make you surrender all your troops with one kick from the boot! I’m the great Italian powerhouse, against this wannabe Apollo! You got your ass beat by NASA, now you’ll get it from the Nasos! When Benito bashes bitches, he ends Phony Wars you commission! And when he knocks you to PLUTO, you’ll be sleeping with the fishes! Mr. “Iron Fist” over here wants to throw punches at the Iron Prefect? When I’m done with you, go tell your little son Yakov “Previet!” I’m a strong, independent leader, and I don’t need no man! Step to us? Well, you’re about as dumb as those Americans! I’m the definition of danger when I roll up to the scene, Squash a Nazi and make a mean Frikadeller from the meat! The Italian Stallion? Soon you’ll all bow to my battalion, Thousands upon thousands, a mountain rushing when I rally ‘em! Set off to Italy, with the most Riveting propaganda, Squash Von Kaiser, Mario, and the anime commander! Yours land? Death lay upon it! My devil dogs are on it! Russia and America? Fear US, we leave you on edge! Try to goose step away, for the eagle never misses its prey, We damage propo-ganders, when attacking, U.S.A. doesn’t play! Mussolini, let me simplify it in a way for you I think will help; You guys have nothing to fear, except the Allied Nations itself. Hirohito hits you hard, puts you in a great Depression! With my impressions, you’ll remember my attacks as legend! For when Hirohito comes to battle, he harbors no grudges, And Frankie, I got the Zsfrom the awful lines you were lugging! Go back to concentrating on my citizens, Forrest Gump, While you get after Adolf for the greedy Jews he’s cleaned up! Your vice man’s tactics lack in impacts until U.S. get obese, Go back to nuking innocents while I squash the Georgia peach! I gotta hand it to you Stalin, you’re easily overdid in speeches, First Superman, now a disabled teammate leave you defeated? I’ll bust a cap in your hat, you rap Kappa, your crap's ratchet, Now go drink your tea, because you just got served in class, bitch! Hand me a cigar! This hypocritical shit won’t fly by me, nah! Even with Shiro Ishii, I turn Emperor Hirohito to Hiroshima! Get your little ho Tojo, I’ll squash that bloke with Mussolini’s chin! No glasses wearing geek is gonna steal the win from Winston! I’m the best with all my enemies, stand for best, you best believe! Success is never final, but when I’m last, that’s right, it’s guaranteed! Your brains are off their axis if you think you can diss me for shit, Cause from America to India, you’d all fail without the brits! I have eyes, and I see my fellow countries and I’s victory arrive! Oh, I’m alive with the sound of the cheers for the Allies! I’ll leave your butts burnt, after I've smoke you blokes to dirt! It don’t matter if I’m the worst, everyone follows the Church! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! AWESOME RAP BATTLES! Who won? Axis Allies Category:Blog posts